


Kissing Courage

by navaan



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Character Study, Episode Related, Episode: s01e18 Worlds Finest, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Kissing, POV Female Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-17
Updated: 2016-04-17
Packaged: 2018-06-02 18:55:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,215
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6578404
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/navaan/pseuds/navaan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She knows she's in love and she doesn't have anything to hide from Jimmy. But her life isn't exactly without complications.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Kissing Courage

**Author's Note:**

> Written as a reaction fic to scenes in Season 1 Episode 18 "Worlds Finest".
> 
> You can also read this story and comment on it on Livejournal [here](http://navaan.livejournal.com/266060.html). Feel free to friend or contact me there.

In a way both Alex and mum are right. Kara has trouble admitting to herself that she wants things and it's hard for her to explain why falling in love and allowing relationships like that to form is easier said than done, because they are her family and they understand but they still haven't had to walk a day on this earth in her alien shoes.

The fact that she isn't like any other girl on the planet becomes the elephant in the room nobody wants to mention on those occasions. She's stronger than most men and she's not sure how well she can control herself in the heat of the moment, because she's never let things get too far. There is only one person on the planet who can understand exactly what she's going through and why sometimes she's afraid to let go even when she thinks she can control herself. But she's not going to call her miraculously grown-up _baby_ cousin to talk about it. 

Superman has much bigger things on his mind and now that she has stepped into the light and embraced the superpowered Kryptonian side of herself, she really does too. She's busy. Someone always needs saving. There is always something more to be done.

Part of her wonders how things would have turned out for her on Krypton if the planet hadn't been destroyed. For the daughter of Alura, as a daughter of the house of El, would she have been a sought after dancing partner? Would she have been popular with boys her age? How easy would it have been to build a normal happy life? Would she have become a famed scientist? A member of the council? Or would she have found another career for herself? Would she have been able to do as much good as she can now? Surely she would have been happy.

And it's not that she isn't happy now. It's just that because everyone tried to give her the chance at a normal life, perhaps she has forgotten how to be not-normal without hiding. She's still Kara Zor-El, but the earth's sun sets her apart and it's been a tough choice to make, but also an easy one to embrace that part of herself. It's still easy to dream about a normal life and normal happiness, though.

Of course, she knows she smiles brighter when James steps into the room. She knows she can't stop smiling when he talks to her. 

And he knows her big secret. That should make everything easier, surely.

It just never works that way. His life is complicated and then at the time when perhaps she could have been a good friend she gets hit with a sort of Kryptonite that gets to her head and makes the worst side of her come out. They are still friends after, but it seems it's never the right time for her to just be with him in the way she wants.

But things have changed so dramatically. Alex is on the run with J'onn and she doesn't have a sister to talk to. Strangely James' ex-girlfriend is becoming the friend she can speak her mind to. She works well with Lucy. They disagree sometimes. They come at things from different angles, but they work together well. And it's ultimately Lucy who tells her to go for it.

So she kisses James – and, of course, life remains complicated. 

It takes all her courage after all the blundering to go for what she wants the most and the Myriad and Kryptonian plots take the moment away from her. 

When James – and the world is safe – and he smiles that wide open smile at her, she just softly smiles back. She's afraid to kiss him again, mad at herself for being a coward. But she can't help it. It's like she's jinxed – or perhaps both of them are.

* * *

Lucy says: “That's just James Olsen. He tries to be a chivalrous knight. He's always trying to aspire to the best of role models.”

She scoffs and Kara has to grin, because she knows Lucy is talking about her cousin.

* * *

She floats and rises upwards towards the sun, her face turned up, her hair fluttering in the wind. Clark follows her and chuckles. His cape is swishing around him like a living thing. They don't do this often enough, perhaps because it's still sometimes jarring to look at her baby cousin and realize that he's a decade older than herself. “I shouldn't say this, because he's your friend,” she says against the wind, but knows he's going to hear it. “I really want to be with him, but this crazy life... it always gets in the way.”

Clark stops laughing. “It has a way of doing that.” his eyes are warm and perhaps a little sad. “But he's Jimmy. He's not afraid of a little complication.”

She stares and bites her lip.

“He does talk fondly of you,” Clark adds with an encouraging smile.

And it's so sweet and awkward to know that, that she shoots up and away, laughing.

* * *

In the end it's James who asks her to come up to the rooftop to talk and then kisses her, before she can even ask what's going on. And suddenly it's all so easy. He's right here and close and she has no trouble holding on to his arms, her grip relaxed and soft and nonthreatening as he embraces her.

“I'm sorry,” he whispers, just as she whispers his name.

And then they both babble at the same time, apologizing and admitting and laughing, and it's easier to just kiss again and touch and laugh, breathless and exhilarated. 

Nobody bursts through the door. They sky doesn't change color and fall. The building is not suddenly under attack.

It's their perfect moment, finally.

“I'm so glad, it's finally out,” she says when he breaks the kiss and pulls her head towards himself, pressing their foreheads together.

“You? I thought that was just me.”

She chuckles. “I'm so... It's so...”

“Complicated?”

“Easy,” she says between chuckles.

“Yeah, yeah,” he says and laughs too. “Want to go out and get some... ice cream? Lunch? Food? Or something?”

“How about dinner? After work? I think Ms. Grant is going to fire me again if I miss out another hour today.”

“Okay,” he says and sighs. “Okay. Sounds nice. I'll pick you up as soon as the dragon lets you out of its lair. And if she doesn't I'm coming to get you.”

“My knight in shining armor.” She grins.

“Glad to serve.” He pulls her close and kisses her, before he lets her go as if it is the hardest thing in the world to do. She feels unsettled and happy and a bit dazed. Suddenly things have just fallen into place and it's so strange and joyous. 

They are both still grinning as they walk down the stairs, his hand clasped into hers. It's normal. Perhaps it would have been like that at home. 

At least, it's like that here and now.

Her life will never be less complicated, but that doesn't mean she can't just be a girl in love. Life doesn't need to be perfect, for her to enjoy the happiness that comes her way.

**Author's Note:**

> You can also find me on [tumblr ](http://navaan.tumblr.com/). This fic has a post [on there](http://navaan.tumblr.com/post/142944569694/fanfiction-supergirl-tv-kissing-courage) in case you want to comment/review/reblog there. [My ask box](http://navaan.tumblr.com/ask) is open if you have questions.


End file.
